My mom will be here tomorrow and is staying until the 25th! I am so excited. We are staying the first night with her in San Salvador in a hotel so we can all catch up without all the other people around. It will be nice. I think I am more excited for Liliana to see her. It will be very special. I can't wait to see their reactions when they reunite. We have a lot planned for her visit down here. She came with me last year so she is prepared for what El Salvador is like, which is a good thing. Hopefully it won't be as much of a culture shock that way. We have rented a beach house in a private beach club called Atami. We will get to spend a week there starting on Monday. We will take Ana, Cristina and Mama Chica with us and then the kids will come on the weekend. I can't wait to have some time to relax by the pool and beach and actually have someone to talk to! I think that's the best part.
When she goes on the 25th, Liliana and I will be flying back as well. It has been a hard decision, but we finally decided it will be the best thing for all of us. I really need a break from ES and flying back with her will be easier so she can help with Liliana. I will have a chance to make more cultured veggies to sell at Cleansing Waters and make some money. I have also been investing in a lot of goods to take back and try to start up an import business. I am planning a big open house and am really looking forward to that. My brother will be in Indy in August as well so the timing is great.
I'm super sad about the fact that we have to leave Eduardo here though. This weighs heavily on my heart. He is happy for us, but is really sad as well. I can't even imagine he and Liliana being apart at all. they have grown really close since being here and her having her papa with her all the time. It's very sweet. It makes me cry just to think about them not seeing each other, but I just have to focus on how good it will be for her to be back in our own environment. I only booked a one-way ticket home and will purchase another round-trip ticket once I am there. I'm not exactly sure what date we will come back, but plan on going for 4-6 weeks. We'll see what happens.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Friday, July 2, 2010
Obstacles
I copied the last 4 entries off of my Immigration Forum. It gives the overall idea of how our appointments with the doctors and embassy have gone over the last two weeks. All in all, it has been very frustrating to say the least. El Salvador in general has been very frustrating. The last 2 days are the first days we have had in weeks to just relax somewhat. Eduardo did go into San Salvador today to hopefully get his driver´s license finally. He took the bus this time. I just couldn´t bear to go and stand in the heat with a cranky baby waiting and waiting. That seems to be what we have been doing a lot lately. Things continue to be very hard here and we just can´t seem to catch a break. Every day I wake up and think something good has to happen today and again we get some kind of bad news. Eduardo is very depressed. Neither of us are ourselves at all. We have been fighting less lately and are feeling a little closer to each other, but it´s still not how we want our relationship to be. There has been a lot of family drama here as well in the past month and it all just adds up to be one big mess! Importing our car unexpectedly took most of our savings and we are down to our last few hundred dollars. This really freaks us out. My mom is coming for a visit next week and will be here for 17 days. Yay! But after that, Eduardo will look for a job. It will most likely be in San Salvador and he will have to take the bus 2 hours each way every day. My heart breaks for him. I know how it´s all killing him to not be working and providing for his family. He has worked so hard for everything he has in the States and it seems as though day by day it is slowly all getting ripped away from him. I know he will do anything he has to for us, but I just hate to see him like this. His family doesn´t help either. It seems like everyone just wants to give him a hard time for the money depletion and not take any responsibility for their part in it and come up with any solution for it. Eduardo and I have been talking a lot and feel it is best for Liliana and I to take a trip to the States ASAP. I was going to wait until October after my visa extension expires, but I think we need a break. Liliana and I need the comforts of home to perk us back up. My mom has agreed to let us stay with them again. We will just go for a month. Unfortunately tickets have gone back up from $550 to $815 now. And Liliana is too big to be sitting on my lap at this point, unless I can drug her to sleep the whole time! ha ha. I will be able to make more cultured veggies to sell at Cleansing Waters which will help financially. We also have invested some money into locally made bags, pillows and other cool things that I am going to take home and sell. I plan on getting a lot more while my mom is here and am excited to start this import business! I´m just sad to leave hubby here and most of all to break apart him and Liliana. She has gotten soooo attached to him since being here and having him around all the time. It´s such a precious relationship. I know it will just be a month apart, but could be so confusing for her. She just not old enough to understand yet. But it will be good for everyone, I keep telling myself that.
Tattoo Issues at 2nd Appt
Eduardo had his 2nd appt on June 28th. We ended up getting the I864 printed off as well as the taxes. They accepted everything as is. But there was one problem. They would not let Eduardo turn in the waiver or pay our remaining balance. They are making a big fuss about the tattoo he has on his arm. they took him into a room where he had to strip down again and they looked for other tattoos and markings. They asked him if he is in a gang, how many friends he has in gangs, which gangs are present in our town and other ridiculous questions he didnt have answers for. They also asked him where he got the tattoo, which was in the States. They wanted the address, but he didn´t have it, just the cross streets in Indy and they proceeded to google it right in front of him, looking for the store. They didn´t find it. They then took pictures of the tattoo and said they need to do further examination of it, looking at the lettering and coloring. This is not good especially since I know of 2 other gals whose husbands were denied in the last couple months because of tattoos. Gang problems are very prevalent in El Salvador right now and they are very skeptical about tattoos of any kind. They told Eduardo they will call him on a Wednesday to let him know what happens next. He asked if it would be this wednesday and they said no, they will call him some other wednesday. Who knows how long we will wait now!! The countdown hasn´t even started yet. I´m am very depressed by this news and don´t know what to do now. I´m thinking that Liliana and I will be returning to the States for a while.
Eduardo´s 1st Appt
Hubby got to the Embassy on June 21st at 6am. They don´t allow you to stand and wait on the Embassy sidewalks so he waited with some other people across the street. They don´t let you inside until 7am, so getting there really early doesn´t really help. He was one of the first ones in and got to see someone very quickly. He said the guy was actually pretty nice, but a lot of the others there were saying their reps were very mean. Guess he got lucky! They checked over all the docs and made a list of what was missing...it was a lot! So frustrating, especially when we are using a lawyer! He needed an updated police record from ES, which we got right away when we left. He also needs a more recent birth certificate with my name added, which is weird. But that is easy to get. The complicated thing is they need 2009 taxes and w2´s from my parents, which are my cosponsors. We have 2008, but not 2009. They just gave them to their accountant recently and it usually takes about a month to get done. My mom said she will call in the morning to see if we can get by Friday. The guy told Eduardo if we don´t have them by Monday, it´s okay but everything will be put on hold and will take even longer! Like it´s not long enough. Then they are saying they need my stepdad´s I864, which my lawyer should have provided and I have emailed her asking what the heck happened!! They have my mom´s info, but not his. They both own their own businesses and file jointly so I guess that complicates things. Lastly, the guy questioned hubby about both of us being married before. Then he saw how I helped my ex go through the process and asked hubby if that was true. Hubby said yes and the guy proceeded to write in red pen on a sticky note and put it in his file! That can´t possibly be good. Once again, the lawyer said that shouldn´t be an issue at all when I asked her in the past about that. I´m really starting to question this lawyer. What does she know about ES anyway! She usually deals with Mexico. I see how important it is to use a lawyer that has dealt specifically with your country.
I wish we never started this process, I´m so frustrated right now. I honestly don´t know how we will make it down here for so long. It´s been very hard to keep my head up lately. Things haven´t gotten any easier here for me. It almost gets more frustrating because things don´t get better. I´m just praying we can make it through...sorry to sound so negative!
I wish we never started this process, I´m so frustrated right now. I honestly don´t know how we will make it down here for so long. It´s been very hard to keep my head up lately. Things haven´t gotten any easier here for me. It almost gets more frustrating because things don´t get better. I´m just praying we can make it through...sorry to sound so negative!
Eduardo´s Psych Evaluation
Eduardo had his psych evaluation on June 18th. The appt lasted about 1 1/2 hours. He said he basically had to give his entire life history; when did his dad die, how was that for him, did he go to school, where has he lived, how did he go to the States. All that kind of stuff. He also asked a lot about me too I guess; have I been married before, do I have kids, how long was I married...those kinds of things. He said the doc was much nicer than the medical doc. He did all the talking. The doc barely said anything, just asked questions. I guess we will never really know how it went, but am glad to have it all over with. Afterwards we had to go drop the "sealed envelope" off at the medical doc's office so it can be forwarded to the Embassy. I'm getting super nervous. I just now finished my personal letter for the packet and emailed it to my lawyer to review. We are going to stay at the Holiday Inn in San Salvador a couple blocks from the Embassy on Sunday night so hubby can be there really early to get a number. His appt is at 7:30am Monday morning. Liliana and I will wait anxiously in our nice air conditioned hotel room. Maybe we'll go swimming, workout, have a bite to eat. haha. Yeah right, I'll be biting my nails the whole time!! Liliana has ripped a couple pages out of my packet when I wasn't looking lately so I am frantic to redo those pages and hole punch them and put it back together. If only my darn printer would cooperate! I'll let you guys know how it goes...
Eduardo´s Medical Exam
We dropped Eduardo off around 9 30am on June 17th. When we called to make the appt they said we didn´t need one and to show up around 7am. That didn´t happen, but we got there early enough. Expat and her hubby were kind enough to drive us and we dropped hubby off and went and ran errands. He called about two and a half hours later for us to pick him up. They only made him receive a couple vaccinations because he had a paper with a list of his previous ones. He had a really horrible experience there though. He was very upset about it on the way home. He said the doctor was just plain awful! He treated him very poorly and in his words as a piece of meat. Poor papito. The doctor gave him a long lecture about drinking and driving because of his prior DUI and very closely looked at his tatto. He took a $100 drug test, which everyone does I guess. All together the visit was around $300. The doctor then referred him to get a psych exam somewhere else and told us to go at 2 30pm. We got there at 1 45 and the receptionist was nice and told us the doc wouldn´t be in the rest of the day and we made an appt to go back tomorrow at 2 15pm. So we will drive all the way back to San Sal again tomorrow. The psych exam will be around $80. While hubby was waiting at the first doctor´s office I guess he had lots of time to talk to the receptionist. hmm. Anyway, she was telling him to make copies of everything we take with us to the embassy because they are horrible about losing documents. I think I will go ahead and make a copy of our waiver packet. I am glad we went today instead of our original plan of Friday since he has to do the psych. Hopefully it goes okay for him. He is being sent for alcohol and tattoo reasons. Luckily our lawyer prepped us for that!
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Daniela´s Birthday
On Sunday Eduardo had the chance to celebrate his daughter Daniela´s birthday with her for the first time. It was very special for both of them, though neither one admitted it verbally. Daniela turned 8 years old. We went to Entre Rios for part of the day. It´s a water park about 15 minutes from our house. The water parks here are very different than in the States. There a usually a variety of different pools to swim in, some with slides, some without. At this particular place there are 2 areas with shallow water for the little ones with lots of slides and playthings. The main difference here is that the pools at the parks are typically fresh water. They do not have insane amounts of chlorine added to them. I like this for the most part because I don´t like chlorine and I don´t want Liliana being exposed to it at such a young age. But the flip side is you never know where the other people swimming have come from and how dirty they are. All in all, the parks are pretty and it´s a nice break from the heat. We took Mama Chica with us. She seemed to enjoy herself, but it was also sad. Papa Ticho knew we were going there for Daniela´s birthday and had been commenting to Eduardo about it before he passed. He was excited to see the animals they have there, particularly the monkeys. I remembered this as we pulled up to the entrance and found it interesting that not one person even mentioned going to see the animals. It was a bittersweet day. Liliana was very cautious of the water at first as she always is. She loosened up more through the day and was totally submersed and loving it by the time we were ready to leave. It was so cute to see her having so much fun. I´m glad I got to experience Daniela´s birthday with her for the 2nd year in a row!
Friday, June 4, 2010
A Salvadoran Funeral
This is something I never would have wished I would experience during my time in El Salvador. Unfortunately last Monday, May 31st, Eduardo lost his dear Grandpa. His name was Patricio Gabrielle Tepas, aka Papa Ticho and he was 93 years old.
I had the pleasure of getting to spend time with Papa Ticho on two separate occassions. The first was last year on my visit to ES with my mom and Liliana. We took grandma and grandpa with us to the beach and watching Papa Ticho in the water was like watching one of the kids. It was the highlight of my trip. Coming back this year, I got to have that experience again. We decided to go to the beach one day and asked the grandparents if they wanted to come with us. Grandma, aka Mama Chica, got so excited she had to sit down because she got dizzy! lol. We took them and they both got to experience the ocean and water again, which is a rare occasion for them.
Papa Ticho and Mama Chica are Eduardo's grandparents from his dad's side. Eduardo's father died when he was nine years old. His mom was so close to his dad's family that she continues to live with and around them to this day. The grandparents live in a room that connects my MIL's house to Eduardo's uncle's house next door. Although that is their son next door, my MIL has always been the one to look after them. That is the kind hearted soul that she is. She feeds them 3 meals a day and makes sure they have everything they need.
Last Monday my MIL, Ana, decided to take Liliana out for a walk because she was getting fussy. She walked out the door and headed up the street. What happened next continues to haunt me. Ana started screaming for Maynor. Maynor went running and I immediately got up from the computer. I knew something wasn't right. I started out the door and up the street as well. She then started screaming for Eduardo. I got closer and Liliana was standing on the ground by herself looking at the scene. I immediately picked her up and saw blood on the ground. Papa Ticho looked as though he had fallen and hit his head. There was blood on his head and Ana and now Eduardo were trying to sit him up. All the moments after are so clear, but everything happened so fast that it's almost a blur. There were people gathering around. I saw Eduardo and a neighbor doing CPR and trying to get Papa Ticho to regain consciousness. Ana was crying hysterically and Daniela had come to see what was going on. Maynor had gone back to the house and I later realized had been praying the whole time. Papa Ticho came to for a minute and a truck pulled up. Eduardo and I ran to the house to get money and anything he would need for the hospital. We ran back and he had already been lifted onto the truck to go to the local clinic. They left and we waited.
Daniela and I walked back into the house and she immediately sat down next to Maynor on the floor and they both proceeded to pray amongst the sobbing tears. I headed outside and Ana said she wanted to go to the clinic. I grabbed my purse and keys and headed out. Aunt Rosita came from across the street to stay with the kids. Ana and I left with Liliana. We got halfway to the clinic and saw the truck headed back. Eduardo motioned to us to go back and we instantly knew it wasn't good.
We got back to the house and the truck was parked out front. Things are done very differently here when someone dies. Papa Ticho was brought back from the clinic in the truck and there he was, lying like he was asleep. It was almost too much for me to handle. I had never seen anyone die before. I couldn't believe what was happening. I guess he didn't even make it to the clinic. The doctor examined him and said there was nothing that could be done. Apparantly he had a heart attack and that caused him to fall and hit his head and go unconscious.
As we all stood there not believing what was happening, all I could think about was Mama Chica. Why wasn't anyone telling her?! They brought her to the front of the house from the back and showed her her husband. It was so awful. She didn't even react at first, looking as if she thought he was sleeping. Then she realized what had happened and Eduardo explained to her that he was gone.
Within minutes it seemed like a casket was brought to the house and his Uncle's next door was being cleared out to make way for the casket and ceremony. He was put into the casket and put in the house. Ana was frantically calling her family and everyone was showing up or on their way. When someone dies here, they don't preserve the body in any way so it all happens very quickly.
Candles were lit everywhere and flowers were being brought. Coffee and bread were being made and bought and being served to every guest. This continued through the night. On the first night everyone stays up the entire night praying and talking and carrying on. I finally had to put Liliana to bed and myself. I didn't sleep well that night. Eduardo came to bed around 4am and didn't get much sleep either.
The next day preparations were being made for the funeral. I tried to call my mom but she was in Oregan in the mountains with my brother completely unreachable. Eduardo was doing everything everywhere and although there were a thousand people all around, I felt completely and utterly alone. It was one of the worst experiences of my life.
The mass at the Church was scheduled for 3pm. At 2:30 everyone would walk alongside the casket up to the church from the house. Luckily before this, I was able to talk to my mom. I told her the story and cried and cried and was able to let it all out. Up until then I hadn't been able to talk to anybody. It was a huge relief. We then set out for the church. I started to walk for a little bit with Liliana while Eduardo took some of the elderly people in the car. Liliana got scared and fussy, so we jumped in the car with them. Thank goodness, it was a long walk! Eduardo thoroughly enjoyed the church service, but I had to excuse myself and go outside with Liliana and play because she wouldn't sit still. After the service everyone walked to the cemetary where Papa Ticho was buried. He was buried alongside Eduardo's dad and his dad and mom I believe. Watching the men all lift him down into the grave was really hard. It was then I really knew I would never see him again. It must have been hard for Ana as well being at the cemetary. Also beside them were the two babies she had lost at two different times in her life. She is such a strong woman to have witnessed so much death and be so kindhearted. I have a lot of respect for her.
Because they are Catholic, they continue to pray for a long time. A vigil is held every day for 9 days in the afternoon next door at Uncle's house. People come and we make coffee and bread is served. On the forth day, today, something more special is given to the people that have been coming to pray. On the ninth day, everyone gathers again and stays up all night praying and have a celebration. Then again on day 40 there is another celebration. I think it's actually a very nice way to honor those that have passed.
Mama Chica is in my thoughts and heart all the time. I've never really known someone to die, let alone live with the surving one. It's been very emotional watching her go through the grieving process. We all try to stay strong for her. Sometimes I can't help it and come to my room and cry. She was really good the first 2 days, but on the 3rd said that the loneliness and emptiness had set in. That broke my heart. Ana and the kids moved their beds into a room with Mama Chica because she doesn't want to be alone. Imagine being married to someone for over 70 years and then waking up one day and they are gone?! Heartbreaking. We later found out that the grandparents had been having their afternoon snack of hot milk and bananas and grandma had sent grandpa outside to watch for a parade type thing that was supposed to be coming. He was going to go back in and get her when it got close. She never saw him again.
I know this is long, but they are memories I want to keep and remember. I especially want to remember my times with Papa Ticho and how he is the cutest old guy I have ever met. He had the cutest voice that I never could understand and he would talk anyway even though I don't speak Spanish. He didn't care. And his laugh...let me tell you. His laugh was the best. It was the cutest little giggle. I remember telling Eduardo on several occassions that I just need to see Papa Ticho every day and it will make my stay here so much better. I wish Eduardo would have told him.
I had the pleasure of getting to spend time with Papa Ticho on two separate occassions. The first was last year on my visit to ES with my mom and Liliana. We took grandma and grandpa with us to the beach and watching Papa Ticho in the water was like watching one of the kids. It was the highlight of my trip. Coming back this year, I got to have that experience again. We decided to go to the beach one day and asked the grandparents if they wanted to come with us. Grandma, aka Mama Chica, got so excited she had to sit down because she got dizzy! lol. We took them and they both got to experience the ocean and water again, which is a rare occasion for them.
Papa Ticho and Mama Chica are Eduardo's grandparents from his dad's side. Eduardo's father died when he was nine years old. His mom was so close to his dad's family that she continues to live with and around them to this day. The grandparents live in a room that connects my MIL's house to Eduardo's uncle's house next door. Although that is their son next door, my MIL has always been the one to look after them. That is the kind hearted soul that she is. She feeds them 3 meals a day and makes sure they have everything they need.
Last Monday my MIL, Ana, decided to take Liliana out for a walk because she was getting fussy. She walked out the door and headed up the street. What happened next continues to haunt me. Ana started screaming for Maynor. Maynor went running and I immediately got up from the computer. I knew something wasn't right. I started out the door and up the street as well. She then started screaming for Eduardo. I got closer and Liliana was standing on the ground by herself looking at the scene. I immediately picked her up and saw blood on the ground. Papa Ticho looked as though he had fallen and hit his head. There was blood on his head and Ana and now Eduardo were trying to sit him up. All the moments after are so clear, but everything happened so fast that it's almost a blur. There were people gathering around. I saw Eduardo and a neighbor doing CPR and trying to get Papa Ticho to regain consciousness. Ana was crying hysterically and Daniela had come to see what was going on. Maynor had gone back to the house and I later realized had been praying the whole time. Papa Ticho came to for a minute and a truck pulled up. Eduardo and I ran to the house to get money and anything he would need for the hospital. We ran back and he had already been lifted onto the truck to go to the local clinic. They left and we waited.
Daniela and I walked back into the house and she immediately sat down next to Maynor on the floor and they both proceeded to pray amongst the sobbing tears. I headed outside and Ana said she wanted to go to the clinic. I grabbed my purse and keys and headed out. Aunt Rosita came from across the street to stay with the kids. Ana and I left with Liliana. We got halfway to the clinic and saw the truck headed back. Eduardo motioned to us to go back and we instantly knew it wasn't good.
We got back to the house and the truck was parked out front. Things are done very differently here when someone dies. Papa Ticho was brought back from the clinic in the truck and there he was, lying like he was asleep. It was almost too much for me to handle. I had never seen anyone die before. I couldn't believe what was happening. I guess he didn't even make it to the clinic. The doctor examined him and said there was nothing that could be done. Apparantly he had a heart attack and that caused him to fall and hit his head and go unconscious.
As we all stood there not believing what was happening, all I could think about was Mama Chica. Why wasn't anyone telling her?! They brought her to the front of the house from the back and showed her her husband. It was so awful. She didn't even react at first, looking as if she thought he was sleeping. Then she realized what had happened and Eduardo explained to her that he was gone.
Within minutes it seemed like a casket was brought to the house and his Uncle's next door was being cleared out to make way for the casket and ceremony. He was put into the casket and put in the house. Ana was frantically calling her family and everyone was showing up or on their way. When someone dies here, they don't preserve the body in any way so it all happens very quickly.
Candles were lit everywhere and flowers were being brought. Coffee and bread were being made and bought and being served to every guest. This continued through the night. On the first night everyone stays up the entire night praying and talking and carrying on. I finally had to put Liliana to bed and myself. I didn't sleep well that night. Eduardo came to bed around 4am and didn't get much sleep either.
The next day preparations were being made for the funeral. I tried to call my mom but she was in Oregan in the mountains with my brother completely unreachable. Eduardo was doing everything everywhere and although there were a thousand people all around, I felt completely and utterly alone. It was one of the worst experiences of my life.
The mass at the Church was scheduled for 3pm. At 2:30 everyone would walk alongside the casket up to the church from the house. Luckily before this, I was able to talk to my mom. I told her the story and cried and cried and was able to let it all out. Up until then I hadn't been able to talk to anybody. It was a huge relief. We then set out for the church. I started to walk for a little bit with Liliana while Eduardo took some of the elderly people in the car. Liliana got scared and fussy, so we jumped in the car with them. Thank goodness, it was a long walk! Eduardo thoroughly enjoyed the church service, but I had to excuse myself and go outside with Liliana and play because she wouldn't sit still. After the service everyone walked to the cemetary where Papa Ticho was buried. He was buried alongside Eduardo's dad and his dad and mom I believe. Watching the men all lift him down into the grave was really hard. It was then I really knew I would never see him again. It must have been hard for Ana as well being at the cemetary. Also beside them were the two babies she had lost at two different times in her life. She is such a strong woman to have witnessed so much death and be so kindhearted. I have a lot of respect for her.
Because they are Catholic, they continue to pray for a long time. A vigil is held every day for 9 days in the afternoon next door at Uncle's house. People come and we make coffee and bread is served. On the forth day, today, something more special is given to the people that have been coming to pray. On the ninth day, everyone gathers again and stays up all night praying and have a celebration. Then again on day 40 there is another celebration. I think it's actually a very nice way to honor those that have passed.
Mama Chica is in my thoughts and heart all the time. I've never really known someone to die, let alone live with the surving one. It's been very emotional watching her go through the grieving process. We all try to stay strong for her. Sometimes I can't help it and come to my room and cry. She was really good the first 2 days, but on the 3rd said that the loneliness and emptiness had set in. That broke my heart. Ana and the kids moved their beds into a room with Mama Chica because she doesn't want to be alone. Imagine being married to someone for over 70 years and then waking up one day and they are gone?! Heartbreaking. We later found out that the grandparents had been having their afternoon snack of hot milk and bananas and grandma had sent grandpa outside to watch for a parade type thing that was supposed to be coming. He was going to go back in and get her when it got close. She never saw him again.
I know this is long, but they are memories I want to keep and remember. I especially want to remember my times with Papa Ticho and how he is the cutest old guy I have ever met. He had the cutest voice that I never could understand and he would talk anyway even though I don't speak Spanish. He didn't care. And his laugh...let me tell you. His laugh was the best. It was the cutest little giggle. I remember telling Eduardo on several occassions that I just need to see Papa Ticho every day and it will make my stay here so much better. I wish Eduardo would have told him.
Saturday, May 29, 2010
My Role as a Stepmom
Spending time with the kids has been an adjustment for everyone. They seem to be loosening up with every visit we have with them and are bonding with Eduardo really well. I struggle at times with boundaries and mostly with communication. Funny thing is I can communicate easier and better with the kids than the adults. It´s more fun too! They seem to enjoy helping me and are eager to learn English as well.
Maynor is a 10 year old cuddly little boy. He is at the time in his life where is voice is changing and when he and Eduardo rough house or he is talking loud, his whiney voice drives me up the wall! Not so much his voice, but his squeel. Poor guy. He is a good looking kid, well they both are actually. I find it interesting how much he likes to cuddle with his papa. It didn´t take long for him to warm up at all. It was instant and their bond keeps getting stronger. It´s really sweet. Maynor just never seems to keep his hands off Eduardo though. I mean seriously, it´s starting me be a little strange for me. If I ever go up to Eduardo and hug him for even an instant, Maynor is right there and has to grab him and hug on him too. I am starting to see a little bit of jealousy forming there.
Daniela on the other hand is the little princess. She has actually taken a while to warm up to her papi and seemed to warm up to me first. She is particulary close with Eduardo´s mom. They are joined at the hip. The more she is warming up to us though, the more independent she is becoming. I can really see her desire for a mommy. It´s really sad and it makes me feel really sad that she hasn´t had that. Not having papi is one thing, but growing up without your mother, especially for a girl is another thing. I feel really good about the bond we are forming and see that relationship blossoming. I feel a maternal instinct with her, but also a strong friendship too.
Kids of this age in general, I have not spent a lot of time around. Eduardo either. It has been an adjustment for both of us. It´s hard for him to have his attention focused in so many directions and it´s hard for us as a couple to adjust to having other kids around that need our attention. I also think that little things that annoy us in other people´s kids don´t so much when they are your own.
The kids spend Monday through Friday morning at their mom´s parents house and our house friday afternoon through Monday morning. We were very close to having them com live with us this week, but after Eduardo consulted with a lawyer, it was decided it´s better for them to stay where they are for now. Legally Eduardo has the right to take them as the father and since the mother isn´t here, but if they fought us we don´t have a very good case right now. We feel it is best is several ways though, especially for our relationship. I´m sure it will all work itself out in time.
I´m not sure if I´ve written before that I have applied for both kids to come to the States as well. I sent the applications off in February. it is a different process for them since they have never been to the States before. It is not as complicated. I didn´t use a lawyer for them to save money, so I´m doing this part on my own and am hoping I don´t mess up. I hope to receive news on their cases soon. If they do get approved they will be able to come and visit. Eduardo wants them to stay in ES until they are 18 and then it will be their choice. They cannot get visitor visas though, so residency is the only way for them to be able to visit us every year.
Maynor is a 10 year old cuddly little boy. He is at the time in his life where is voice is changing and when he and Eduardo rough house or he is talking loud, his whiney voice drives me up the wall! Not so much his voice, but his squeel. Poor guy. He is a good looking kid, well they both are actually. I find it interesting how much he likes to cuddle with his papa. It didn´t take long for him to warm up at all. It was instant and their bond keeps getting stronger. It´s really sweet. Maynor just never seems to keep his hands off Eduardo though. I mean seriously, it´s starting me be a little strange for me. If I ever go up to Eduardo and hug him for even an instant, Maynor is right there and has to grab him and hug on him too. I am starting to see a little bit of jealousy forming there.
Daniela on the other hand is the little princess. She has actually taken a while to warm up to her papi and seemed to warm up to me first. She is particulary close with Eduardo´s mom. They are joined at the hip. The more she is warming up to us though, the more independent she is becoming. I can really see her desire for a mommy. It´s really sad and it makes me feel really sad that she hasn´t had that. Not having papi is one thing, but growing up without your mother, especially for a girl is another thing. I feel really good about the bond we are forming and see that relationship blossoming. I feel a maternal instinct with her, but also a strong friendship too.
Kids of this age in general, I have not spent a lot of time around. Eduardo either. It has been an adjustment for both of us. It´s hard for him to have his attention focused in so many directions and it´s hard for us as a couple to adjust to having other kids around that need our attention. I also think that little things that annoy us in other people´s kids don´t so much when they are your own.
The kids spend Monday through Friday morning at their mom´s parents house and our house friday afternoon through Monday morning. We were very close to having them com live with us this week, but after Eduardo consulted with a lawyer, it was decided it´s better for them to stay where they are for now. Legally Eduardo has the right to take them as the father and since the mother isn´t here, but if they fought us we don´t have a very good case right now. We feel it is best is several ways though, especially for our relationship. I´m sure it will all work itself out in time.
I´m not sure if I´ve written before that I have applied for both kids to come to the States as well. I sent the applications off in February. it is a different process for them since they have never been to the States before. It is not as complicated. I didn´t use a lawyer for them to save money, so I´m doing this part on my own and am hoping I don´t mess up. I hope to receive news on their cases soon. If they do get approved they will be able to come and visit. Eduardo wants them to stay in ES until they are 18 and then it will be their choice. They cannot get visitor visas though, so residency is the only way for them to be able to visit us every year.
Appt Date
I realized I haven´t written about our appt date at the embassy, the whole reason we are here! I received an email about a month ago now stating Eduardo´s 1st appt is on June 21st. I was actually pretty devasted hearing the news although I should´ve been happy. We thought our timing was pretty good with when Eduardo quit his job and us coming down here, but I guess we couldn´t have been more off. We ended up being here a couple months too early. I cried a lot at the time, but now realize there is not much we could have done differently. Everything we have done thus far has been with the best intentions and what we thought was the right thing. These things are just out of our control.
So Eduardo will first go to his medical exam on June 19th and then his first appt on June 21st. He then has a 2nd appt scheduled for June 28th. That will hopefully be the final appt. From there on out it is just a waiting game. The current wait times in El Salvador are ridiculously long. The rate the Embassy is processing waivers right now is nothing short of pathetic actually. We are probably looking at 12 to 16 months from the last appt date. Pretty scary. I try not to think about it too much yet because it just makes me sick. We were prepared for a long haul, but it seems to just get longer. I just pray we can make it through this time and that we get a speedy approval, nothing less than an approval! There is no other option!!
So Eduardo will first go to his medical exam on June 19th and then his first appt on June 21st. He then has a 2nd appt scheduled for June 28th. That will hopefully be the final appt. From there on out it is just a waiting game. The current wait times in El Salvador are ridiculously long. The rate the Embassy is processing waivers right now is nothing short of pathetic actually. We are probably looking at 12 to 16 months from the last appt date. Pretty scary. I try not to think about it too much yet because it just makes me sick. We were prepared for a long haul, but it seems to just get longer. I just pray we can make it through this time and that we get a speedy approval, nothing less than an approval! There is no other option!!
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