Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Missing my Husband

I have refrained myself from blogging on this topic since I have returned back to the States.  It's really something that goes without saying, but it's really so much more than what isn't said.  

The words "I miss you" don't really begin to describe the aching in my heart for Eduardo.  It's not something I ever thought could be experienced.  I have missed people before, but this I've never felt.  It's literally like a rock is weighing on my heart.  

I find I can't talk about our situation too much anymore with people.  After 2 months of separation now, the pain is all too real.  

I have to keep busy.  It's the only thing that works to not break down.  As long as I am busy and going all the time, I am fine.  

Last week I found myself with a lot of spare time somehow.  I didn't have appointments, I had plenty of veggies already made and it was a super long week with just Liliana and I.  I wish I could say I enjoyed it more than I did.  To make it worse, Eduardo was staying in the city for the week working so I couldn't even call him or Skype.  Then everytime we spoke I would just break down crying.  I tried so hard not to, but it would just come in a big wave.  I tried to be strong for Liliana, but it was hard.

This week is better, but it's hard not being able to talk with Eduardo as much as we want since his work hours are so long now.  Sometimes I wish he would just quit and I can send him more money so at least Liliana can talk and see him whenever she wants.  

But we'll make it through.  I hope these next few months will go really quick and then he will be back.  I pray I will never take my husband for granted again and I promise to always appreciate everything we have been through to be together.

1 comment:

Lisa n Javi said...

Stay strong Amiga. We all know what you are going through, it is definetly hard being away for so long and not being able to talk does not help. But remember how strong you are and that you are fighting for you family which will be together one day. Take care